But really, what can I say that every other blog Mommy isn't already saying? Time is going too fast, my baby girl is too smart, too funny, too beautiful, getting so big, and I enjoy every moment.
We are now officially in June. This marks a big month for us. The month baby Natalie reaches her first birthday. She started getting up on her own and walking at the end of March, early April, and has used this new ability to become a mini terror. We are trying to show her sign language, but I also fail at sticking with it consistently. She still doesn't talk much, except her famous shout speak. She now points, tries to clap [and misses], waves on occasion, sometimes sleeps through the night, stops to dance every few minutes, and still has a baby fine blonde thin layer of hair that can't get a bow clipped to. What a wonderful world it must be to live in though, where we can just stop to dance every few minutes. I think we should all have moments like this. She is such a happy little tot, and she makes us happy big parents.
I am in denial about her upcoming birthday. I keep saying I am making all these plans for it, but the realization my baby isn't staying a baby is kind of heart breaking. The past few months, it has become quite clear to me that I am different from my other Mommy friends. I still feel so overwhelmed at just holding her, and overjoyed at every smile, kiss, hug. I like to keep her with me all the time, and find I don't really require much "Me" time that so many other Moms seem to need. I miss her when she goes to sleep, and get excited when she's up and ready to play. She is my miracle baby, and I don't think I have gotten over the concept that she is even here. My best friend thinks I am so worried that this could all disappear, that I hover over her.
My name is Rhonda Lee Moore, and I have "Mommy" issues.
At first, this concerned me a bit, but the more I think about it. I'm proud. This age does go fast. Who cares if I want to enjoy every moment of it. I was told that I had slim chances to experience this, but here I am, now over six years later, with a child who I find perfect in every way, getting ready to turn one. I don't take this blessing for granted. I love all the perks of my new status in life. I traded in my car for a Mommy version, all of my statuses revolve around my Mommy life, my pictures are updated based on how old Natalie is. I think of activities to do that involve a family outing, I get excited over play dates, new milestones, and new toys. I love driving in the car with my best friend, or going on stroller walks, while our girls babble to each other just like we are. I love when Natalie and I look at each other, and smile, like we have our own little world. If you find my mothering over bearing, guess what, I no longer care. I don't care what you think, I care about my child. That's not saying I don't get frustrated. Natalie thinks its a game to test her boundaries, and she gets in trouble just like every other baby. But I LOVE being her Mom. Yeah maybe it is a little odd, and yes it has changed me from the person I was just two years ago. But hey, you don't know me, you don't know my struggle, and if all you wish to do is judge a stranger, then you will stay just that to me. A stranger we won't invite in. It really is your loss bc I'm kinda a catch as a friend ;)
On the note of the miracle that is Natalie, that is another issue I have been dealing with. PCOS. I knew the symptoms were returning for a while. Pretty much as soon as I began having issues with milk supply in her second week of life. But I fought through the dilemma, and figured things were ok. Then the other symptoms started showing up. The fatigue, the hair loss, headaches, and finally the worse... the constant weight gain. I begin to blame the symptoms to being a new Mom, not sleeping enough, the hormones after birth. But after increasing my work outs, regardless how tired I was, and packing on 30 pounds still, I decided to see a doctor. It took another month of explaining the background, but I am on metformin again as of two weeks ago. And now? I have been able to loose five pounds! After months of working so hard, to only see the scale go up, it is such a relief! It's a little worrisome that if my PCOS is "acting up" again, what kind of trouble is that going to cause for baby number two? But I can't think about that right now. I signed up for the road race series, which consists of jogging four 5Ks, one 8K, and one 10K. So during Natalie's naps [which we are finally getting a good hour a day] I train for that. I guess you could consider that my non Mommy hobby?
Daddy Moore, amidst all our growing and learning, is also on his own path of discovery. We reenlisted until the year 2016, which now with a child becomes "when Natalie is 6", and "how many more deployments". But he is now considering an officer program. It would allow him to obtain a college degree. He would have to sign up for a minimum of 5 years after receiving this degree, but as of right now, we have five years left anyways.
So after another long hiatus, this is where the Moore Family is. Just like every normal family, we have ups and downs. Mostly ups. I am so happy at this point in my life. Just like Natalie, I like to stop and dance.
I really don't think anyone reads my blog anyways. But one day I would like to look back and see the point I was at, see where I was, to what ever I have grown to be at that particular moment. That's one of the points of blogging in my opinion.
So now I end this, as Natalie and I share another "smile" moment over spinach quiche. She loves spinach. Just like me. Just like my Mom. :)
